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JenLivingLifeLeave a comment

That’s what I get for exercising

cartoon_bugs

Last night Roger and I strapped on our backpacks and went for a hike deep, deep in the woods. Jeans, snakeboots, long sleeve shirt, gloves, hat and and bug shield whole head cover. (It’s Florida, this is necessary) I should be good to go right. Wrong!! A hard hike complete, we hop in the truck to head home. Now mind you the only things I have removed at this point are my gloves and whole head cover. Whammo, something bit or stung me on my upper left arm. Figuring it was another freaking yellow fly (demon spawns from Hell they are) I smack and figure oh great, another 3 weeks of itching like crazy. Oh, how I wish, how I wish that’s all it was! I think the yellow flies have heard my nasty remarks about wishing for their extinction and have formed an evil plot against me. By the time we got home not only was I itching like mad I was now also quite swollen. I’m super sensitive to those demon spawns so some swelling is to be expected. This started to go beyond that. I put on some topical itch relief stuff which did help to stop the itch but now my arm was feeling hot and huge. Ok, hmmm??? Roger decides maybe it was a wasp. I’ve never been stung by a wasp so I have no idea how I’ll react and off to google I go. Yep, seems like this could be a wasp instead. Packed in ice, I headed for bed. I didn’t sleep because the swelling was interfering with my circulation just enough to get the tingles, driving me nuts. By morning the whole upper arm, elbow to shoulder was monster sized, hard as a rock and hot as lava. Oddly enough I just happened to have a doctor’s appointment anyway so I figured I could wait for that. I got there, in comes the doc, checks my arm, returns in a few with a shot. Now I’m on a steroid for the “allergic reaction”. Let me remind you, we were out there to get hard core exercise, exercise I desperately need because
I can’t stand being this chunky. Now I’m on a steroid which will make me GAIN. Lovely.

Yellow fliessplatbug and there evil pals (wasps I assume – still unknown) 1, Me 0. This is not the end. Oh you better watch out you demon spawns from Hell. It’s on now. I will take down everyone of you I see and you’re evil pals too!

 

*Update:  I’m seriously thinking about inventing my staypuffvery own hazmat suit with a built in air conditioner. I’ll be all Stay Puff Marshmallow in the woods. Maybe I could make the a/c’s exhaust kill all the demon spawns. Hmmmm

JenLivingLifeLeave a comment

Things My Husband Says #theGilbertconnection

Background: We’re empty nesters. We now have to entertain our own selves yet we don’t like the same tv shows or basically any of the same things. We do, however, drink a little. We don’t like to drive if we’ve been drinking, even in small amounts. Ok, we don’t really know the meaning of small doses. We like being alive too much to drink and drive. We’re too cheep to pay for a DUI . Take your pick. The point is we have a lot of time at home, just the two of us and our liquor cabinet, and our 3 dogs plus one psycho cat. Soooo… we listen to a lot of Pandora cranked up while enjoying a few coctails in the evenings. We’ve added a competitive level to our listening by trying to name that artist before the one can.

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A song comes on. I’m feeling the knowledge. I can get this one. The wheels are turning in my head. The mumbling of my random thoughts are putting it together. My fingers are tapping each other like I’ve just figured out the plot to take over the world. I’ve got it and I announced the artist. This is what followed:

Him:  How you got there I’ll never know. (knowing something crazy just went down in my brain)

Me: Brantley Gilbert – Little House On The Prairie – Laura Ingles – Melissa Gilbert – Gilbert – Brantley Gilbert – duh!

Laura's happyarrow-clip-art-othersBrantley_Gilbert_2013